she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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