I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
