it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
My balls are so social today.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
