i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
