ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Randomize
