how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
whose parrot is this?
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
