Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
