i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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