I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
