I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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