You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
That reminds me...we need to get swords
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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