Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
