Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
