Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Randomize