this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
