Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
