And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
