Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize