Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
