That's intense
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Randomize
