well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Randomize
