I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
