I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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