I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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