I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You've changed since you got that strap on
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
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