It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
