Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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