these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
