I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Help me help you realize you are a moron
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
