I wannas sexs uuuuu
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
