did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
