This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
