You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize