Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
