got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
