is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
