PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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