So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
