do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
