When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
