There is no way he is gay with that hair.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
