big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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