This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
