the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ass is underappreciated
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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