I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
