i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
