my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
