mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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