i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize