we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He keeps bees of course he's weird
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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